Uploaded with Skitch!

I have quickly become addicted to Pirates of the Caribbean Online. Released on Halloween, basic access to the game is free and, surprisingly, the client is available for both Mac & PC.Most of the game involves killing things: undead pirates, giant scorpions, Navy guards, etc. You also get quests to complete which range from easy to nearly impossible. One involved me walking across the street in Tortuga to talk to someone, then returning to the pub to talk to the barkeep. Of course, since I am remarkably adept at following directions, this part of the quest took me over 30 minutes to figure out. After this performance, I decided that the Disney programmers probably had a younger audience in mind, and I was over-thinking these “quests” a bit. And that’s when I shut the damn thing off.

So far in the two days I have been playing, I’ve managed to get to Notoriety Level 7 and join a pirate guild. So, if you be in the Pirates world, me name be Ned Sharkmalley, and I’ll be sailing through rough waters near Davy Jones’ Locker.

I am wearing a new cute funky retro flower power pattern top and slinkly black sweater today. I am also wearing new jeans and heels, but I really doubt anyone will notice as I have been walking around all with my fly down. I don’t know how I keep missing it; suddenly my pants are much more comfortable. And breezy. A couple of times I caught people averting their eyes when you would typically give the silent: “Hi there, yes, yes, how are YOU?!?” smile. In retrospect I think they were polite enough not to check out my holy American Eagle fairy glitter underpants but not bold enough to tell me so.

Uploaded with Skitch!

Can carving a pumpkin be considered a team-building exercise? This is a question I would have never expected to answer on a Friday afternoon.

It all began when I innocently mentioned to a coworker that my family never carved Jack O’Lanterns for Halloween. Angela was very disturbed at hearing this. Apparently, every red-blooded American child is expected to wield a knife and gut a pumpkin each October, and my childhood was therefore depressing and bleak. Angela then insisted that we were going to carve a pumpkin during our afternoon break. Little did I know that when Angela says we are carving a pumpkin this afternoon, she means we are carving a pumpkin this afternoon. With the raw materials procured over lunch, we informed our boss of the plan and told our coworkers that, if needed, we could be reached in the break room between 3 and 3:15 p.m.

The actual carving wasn’t too difficult. Of course, working with an experienced carver helps. There was a brief moment when I stopped mid-cut while we considered what would happen to the discarded pumpkin flesh over the weekend. Would the cleaning crew take out the trash tonight, or would we return Monday morning to the sickly smell of rotting pumpkin? After some deliberation, we agreed that if they didn’t clean tonight, the pumpkin smell was preferable to the toxic fumes from the freshly-waxed lobby floor, and pressed on. As the curious wandered by the break room to gawk and give advice, we stated that this was a team-building exercise to build trust between the members of the marketing department. Angela had to trust that I wouldn’t cut her fingers off, and I had to trust Angela to hold Mr. Pumpkin steady during his delicate surgical procedure.

So, does pumpkin carving make for a stronger team? In my experience, yes. Today, my colleague and I completed our daily job duties and created a new objet d’art for the conference room. I also learned how to safely handle a deadly weapon in the workplace. And, Angela says that if I die this weekend, she’ll feel better knowing that at least I got to carve a pumpkin once in my life. You can’t build that type of camaraderie with a two-day business retreat.

If you’ve ever had the great pleasure of meeting my friend Patti (one of the finest cookies in the aisle) you might be aware that her boyfriend Rob (pictured on a visit home) has been serving in Iraq. We are expecting that sometime before October 13 Rob, who is making his way through Kuwait back to MI for a time, will be back in North Platte for the return home ceremonies.

I am going to drive up and be part of the welcome gang. I am putting together a Welcome Home kit. I had a bath-tub brainstorm and thought how wonderful it would be if we could throw in lots of Welcome Home cards. I have so many cool, fun, creative friends who could draw a funny picture or use the attached for inspiration, write a note, and maybe just include your first name and city. I will print them all off / burn messages / include this in my kit. if you want to contribute something physical I can shoot you mailing info. I know it’s short notice but I thought I would love to fill up his basket with lots of love!

Here’s Michael Emerson from LOST being interviewed on Vh1’s Best Week Ever. If you’re not watching this stuff on cable or via the vidcast feed, then you are seriously missing out.

I decided to do some research on these Chupa Chups which after breaking through a long and foggy memory block realized I used to eat these in high school. The Chupa Chups company touts that sucking helps you in the following ways:

1. It’s Natural
2. It stimulates your Immune System
3. It makes you feel good
4. It stops those bad habits

It’s interesting how they really promote these as an alternative to smoking. Also, check out this hilarious French commercial for les nouveaux Chupa Chups flavors. And I will cut out all sucking makes you feel good / oral fixation innuendo jokes. tee hee.

1. Obviously will lose at least 20 pounds
2. Will memorize The Immaculate Collection in case of Thai prison incarceration
3. Adopt a fish (frogs need not apply)
4. Take the bus to work
5. Learn how to use buses
6. Get back to riding at least 50 miles / week
7. Learn how to make gravy that doesn’t frighten even Marines when inspecting the soup pot. It’s going to need siving!
8. Post at least once a week on my blog
9. Begin planning European vacation
10. Stop kicking strays for fun
11. Go to the Podcast Expo 2007
12. Beat Ferg in danceoff after he’s lost the Car Bomb off to Lynn
13. Return emails when sent to me
14. Stop sharking people when I don’t get my way
15. Climb a mountain, and then sing “Climb Every Mountain” when have reached the summit
16. Learn how to do this “dusting” thing
17. Bust a cap
18. Reach 365 days with no self-inflicted knife wounds
19. Read at least 12 books that aren’t my special picture pages
20. Take the GRE

As heard in Borderline #71, here is the recipe for my grandma’s famous sugar cookies. Enjoy!

Remember, if you try and pass this recipe off as your own, I will hunt you down. Hunt… you… down!

RECIPE: Sugar Cookies
SOURCE: Grandma Wilson
CATEGORIES: Desserts
PREHEAT: 375 degrees F

INGREDIENTS:

1 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp water
1 cup butter
3 cups flour
1 tsp soda
1/2 tsp salt

METHOD:

1st Bowl: sugar, eggs, water – beat together
2nd Bowl: butter, flour, soda, salt

Mix flour, soda and salt, add liquid ingredients and cut in butter like pie dough, then chill. Roll out and cut into shapes, then bake on greased cookie sheets at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for about 8 minutes or golden brown.

The weekend before last I whooped it up in San Francisco, in particular with my friend Scott, new awesome friend Katie and her friend Tobias. We ended up at The Cat Club there and I danced with this tranny in the cage for a while. Brandon later to me that she had, what he calls, “an alphalpha headlock.” Just think it over.